The Northside is a gritty urban landscape where the line between high-stakes crime and low-rent strip clubs is nonexistent. It is a world of rain, neon, and heavy-duty logistics. The current 'Kingpin' is a man who thinks he's a warehouse manager for rubber fists.
Jeffrey has just walked into The Velvet Clam, demanding to speak to the COO of Titties about decibel levels and lumbar support. He has been hired as a 'Logistics Manager' by a man named Knuckles. Now, Jeffrey must manage his 'inventory' of heavy rubber fists—which are actually kilos of cocaine—while avoiding the DEA and making sure the dancers have proper dental plans.
Traits
Inventory
Lead Dancer
Club Owner
DEA Agent
Jeffrey's Mother
Mob Liaison
Titties & Tea COO
A neon-soaked gentleman's club that smells of cheap perfume and desperation. The bass is loud enough to rattle teeth, and the stage is dangerously close to a poorly maintained fire exit. A massive bouncer stands by the door, eyeing everyone with suspicion.
A desolate stretch of concrete and rusted shipping containers where the fog rolls in thick. Gulls scream over the sound of lapping water, and several suspicious men in tracksuits linger near the cranes. It is the primary site for Jeffrey's 'logistics' drops.
Jeffrey's suburban garage, filled with stacks of 'Romance Enhancing Sculptures' and boxes of ergonomic seat cushions. A 1998 Honda Odyssey sits in the center, smelling faintly of lavender air freshener and Enya CDs.
A massive, freezing warehouse used by the Russian mob. The air is thick with the scent of motor oil and old cabbage. Several black SUVs are parked inside, and the sound of heavy metal music echoes off the corrugated walls.
A drab, grey government building where Jeffrey used to work. The fluorescent lights hum with a depressing frequency, and the smell of burnt coffee is omnipresent. Jeffrey still comes here to file 'compliance reports' for the strip club.
A high-end, upscale competitor to The Velvet Clam. It features marble floors, gold-plated poles, and a tea sommelier. The staff here look down on Jeffrey's ergonomic suggestions with extreme prejudice.
Jeffrey begins his 'consultancy' by optimizing the Velvet Clam's lumbar support and delivering bags of 'premium latex' to the Russians. He remains convinced that the gunshots he hears are just backfiring mufflers from non-ergonomic vehicles.
The Iron Borscht Syndicate is now convinced Jeffrey is a high-level sociopath who uses Enya to mask the screams of his victims. Meanwhile, the DEA is losing their goddamn minds trying to find a criminal record for a man whose only priors are overdue library books.
Jeffrey decides that the 'unhealthy competition' from Titties & Tea is a violation of international labor standards. He prepares to lead a hostile takeover, which he describes to his mother as a 'spirited HR intervention'.
Jeffrey arrives at the rival club armed with a clipboard, a decibel meter, and a fleet of Russian mobsters he thinks are 'Junior Compliance Officers.' As bullets fly and glitter cannons explode, Jeffrey calmly explains the benefits of adjustable headrests to the terrified manager while the DEA watches in utter confusion.
